25.4.12

The Luxury Of Aging

My age is showing.

Silvery gray hair taking over my temples, aches and pains when I sit in one position for too long, the complete inability to down shot after shot and still function the next day... It's all gone gone gone, left in the hazy memory of my youth.

Some days I feel wise and experienced; others I'm fumbling toward decrepitude and decay.

But I never doubt for a second that I'll wake up tomorrow and the day after and the day after. Older, grayer, more dismayed at teen culture than the day before, more accepting of myself as time marches on.

There are people in my life who don't have that luxury.

My son has been terrorizing his little sister. I sat him down in a quiet moment today and told him my story. I shared with him that I wasted my childhood fighting with my sisters, with that sister in particular, and that I regret it every single day of my life.


As an adult, when her life is a struggle and she can take nothing for granted, I understand that she was a gift given to me when I was just four years old. But then? She was a brat, a nuisance, the kid who stole all the attention, who I thought had an easy ride.

We're both older now, and she's older than we ever thought she'd be. Yet I rarely see her age written across her expression or her attitude. She's forever hopeful, forever determined, forever young.


And so my age is showing. Time marches on and the gray strands will soon outnumber the brown and I'll eventually need to turn the music down in the car and I won't understand what the youngsters are talking about.

And I am so unbelievably grateful. (But, Lord, please let her ever remain by my side.)


18 comments:

  • Melissa

    Yes, Lord, yes: as Kelly says. Amen.

  • Stacia

    So many people are praying that prayer for you, Kelly. So many. Hugs.

  • alita jewel

    This is in my prayers for you and for your sister, Kelly. I pray that age will hold you gracefully in its path and that your sister will remain with you there.

    I pray for peace in your heart and I pray the very same for her.

    Thank you for sharing this, Kelly.

    Alita

  • Justine

    I'm rooting for her too! Age is definitely a luxury that we take for granted.

  • Mel Gallant

    My family is rather fragmented (I am the only one who speaks to every member) and your post reminds me that the effort to keep the links of family together far outweigh the bitter resentment, petty jealousies etc that have left my siblings and parents to no longer try.

    Thanks for that positive message, and I hope your sister remains by your side for years to come.

  • TKW

    You just reminded me to be very grateful toay. xo

  • Rudri Bhatt Patel @ Being Rudri

    A resounding YES to these words. Thank you Kelly and of course to Ashley. She's taught all of us about resilience, both physical and mental.

  • BigLittleWolf

    You remind us that growing older is a privilege. And we waste so much time on nonsense.

    Love to you - and to your little sister.

  • Arnebya

    How fitting that I should read this today. I'm so glad you've had time to learn to treasure and appreciate time iwth your sister. I say it's fitting because I had a similar conversation with my oldest daughter today about her younger sister. They used to be inseparable. Now they barely speak without a shove or eye roll.

  • Hyacynth

    Oh, yes, Lord. Please. Give her gray strands of time in her hair, too. I recall years of fighting with my sister, too. Now? She's one of my best friends. We have a lot of conversations in this house like the one you had with J. Beautifully expressed, Kelly.

  • Cathy Reaves

    Kelly - you so aptly reminded me of the importance of perspective. I write about it enough, but these reminders are so important. I hope you and your sis get to grow old together.

  • Heather Caliri

    Having not known my grandparents, I think I always have longed for the days when I'm older, and able to gather my family around me. Isn't that the beauty of being older? The connections and friendships that we finally have the perspective to see and understand?

  • Courtney Foster

    It's funny how we grow out of things but realized how much we missed out those days because of the way we acted. I pray you also get more time with your sister, she is amazing.

  • Sarah

    We all are praying with you, Kelly. Hugs.

  • C (Kid Things)

    Such a great perspective. Here's to many more years of grey hairs, and health and happiness.

  • Tiffany

    I really liked this perspective on age. What a blessing!

  • Jade @ Tasting Grace

    I'm glad that, whatever your differences were as children, you've overcome them and become close since.

  • Cheryl

    A perspective on age that too many of us realize too late. Thank you for the reminder.

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