QOTD: Bad behavior

In the car on the way home from the bus stop, Javi looks sweetly over at me and says, "Okay, I have to tell you something."

Me: You misbehaved at school?

Javi: I KINDA got in trouble for drawing but I just HAD to draw because I haven't in SO LONG. So I just sat REALLY quietly at my desk and drew A FEW pictures without talking to ANYONE.

Me: So you got an X on your behavior report?

Javi: Pretty much.

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This morning as I was getting dressed to take Bella to school, she discovered a teeny-tiny-baby pig on the floor beside her. She scooped him up in her palm and turned toward me.

Bella: I got dis baby pig, Mama!

Me: Oh, what a sweet little baby pig. Can I hug him?

Bella: No! Dat baby pig in big trouble. Dat baby pig TIME OUT, Mama. You no touchin it.

Me: Wow, okay. Bad baby pig.

Bella: Yes. Bad baby pig. I beatin dis baby pig! You gettin' spank BABY PIG!

She then threw the baby pig down with disgust and beat the pretend crap out of it. When her arm got tired she picked up a shoe and beat it some more.

Bella: Okay, baby pig. You not trouble no more. You dead baby pig. SEE WHAT YOU DO!

(I promise we do not beat, torture, or otherwise abuse our children. I can only guess there's a secret Dora episode only she can see where sweet Boots gets the ax. What other explanation is there?)

This is but one example of why we are THAT family.